The Drama of Offsets

It is just after the end of the terrible War Between The States (Confederacy Name) or the Civil War (Union Name). A devastated plantation must be re-energized. The hope of the lady managing the estate on behalf of her late husband resides in improved economic efficiency …

Southern Belle (SB): Oh woe is me! My plantation has been looted by those damn Yankees and I need to bring it back to shape to harvest and process the crops. I need the best in new technology!

Union Officer (UO): Pardon me, Miss. Is that your lovely plantation over there? You seem distraught! Perhaps I may be of assistance.

SB: Yes, it is. Well, it was lovely, but now I am in need of some technology infusion.

UO: Well, the Union industrialists can certainly help you with that! You are aware we are very high in technological developments. It would seem we could provide excellent terms for Causality in your business.

SB: Well, sir, I do see where your approach could be considered valid Causality but I am fearful I will not get the best Additionality via the technology transfer.

UO: Have no fear, Miss! We always have Additionality going on via our training and investments! Perhaps I could interest you in a little Technology Transfer discussion.

SB: I don’t know; much of your past technology ‘transfer’ was rather disturbing to my plantation – will we really get the best, or will you only transfer old Technology?

UO: My Technology may look old, but it’s state of the art – it was good enough to take the South back into the Union.

SB: (Thinking) You carpet baggers are all the same. Always bragging about your useless technology. (Saying) I suppose you want a multiplier! (Sarcastic) How long will this take? I cannot wait forever and will need a precise Period of Performance – Most of you contractors want a short performance period. Or when you have troubles with your technology you immediately claim Force Majeure.

UO: Well, I can promise you this technology is Sustainable and with a good Period of Performance – its Exportability is proven and your plantation certainly has the Capacity to absorb it.

SB: What about Closure or Termination. I want to make sure we agree on when the Technology has been successfully delivered. I will want Bank Guarantees that hold you accountable!

UO: You set the terms of Closure or Termination. I want to meet your expectations. But there is no need for a BANK Guarantee – our corporation is well founded and will make good on the deal. I am sure we can work something out by Multiplying our stake in the plantation.

Just then a former Confederate Officer (CO) steps in.

CO: I am so sorry, Ma’am, but I could not help but overhear you talking about Technology Transfer – can I help?

SB: I don’t know, are you an Eligible Party?

CO: Yes, Ma’am! I can be if you want me to help – I have worked to get many plantations back to profitability; I am in the business of improving business, and I have great connections!

UO: Sir, I feel you may be intruding! We were discussing the Causality and Capacity of providing Technology Transfer.

SB: Well, we seem to be at a standstill about that Technology Transfer. He wants to transfer some old stale Technology without a good Performance Guarantee. On top of that he is asking for multipliers. I am really not interested.

CO: If you don’t like his old technology, maybe I could offer you something newer with Intellectual Property rights. My technology has demonstrated benefits; it is European and it took hundreds of thousands of dollars to develop and verify. But all that offset talk is for later. Can I interest you in mint julip on the veranda? I have a freshly made pitcher just for the tasting.

SB: Why that would be delightful!

The SB takes the CO’s arm as they walk away.

SB: Tell me more Robert (Friendly tone)

SB and CO walk off the stage as if in conversation leaving the UO stranded.

UO: (turning to the audience) Let that be a lesson to you Yankees – it isn’t always about the technology – it is often about the relationship!

The End

PS: If this sounded fun, join us in San Diego in mid-November at the GOCA El Coronado conference – watch the Blues Brothers attempt to deliver a critical offset proposal under dangerous circumstances!